Terrified but Motivated

As I prepare for my 2nd Brown Belt exam I have to admit, I am scared, no wait-scratch that, I'm terrified. As with any new obstacle, I've begun to reflect on my past 6 exams. None have evoked the terror within me that this one does. It's the first exam I've had that will have a written section. Written is something I'm good at normally; but these words, definitions and principles are things I've only just barely begun to understand. And don't even get me started on the physical portion. 7 forms, plus one of my own creation, 9 sets, and 154 techniques. Despite all the material piled in front of me that's not what is most terrifying; it's who is testing me. This is my first exam with Gene as my instructor. And I am terrified, because he knows what I have trouble with, and he's going to be incredibly picky, a hard ass. I know without a doubt that if I don't perform at the level of a 2nd Brown Belt he will have no problem failing me. And I respect the hell out of him for that. I know he's set the bar high, higher than I may even expect because let's face it, we're in a relationship and the last thing either of us ever wants is to hear someone think I was handed my rank because we live together. Thus I am terrified, in a few months I'm going to be put through the hardest exam I've ever experienced. Terrified as I am, I am excited, dying for the chance to prove myself. I plan on kicking ass in that exam; these fears and unsettling feelings in the pit of my stomach are nothing but motivation