Bullying

Bullying has always been around. However it seems that recently it's exploded with such an easy access to technology. Not only is there physical and verbal violence there's also cyber bullying, text bullying, and passive aggressive bullying through hateful rumors and photo shopped images. According to GLADD 13 million children are bullied each year in the United States; and 3 million students are absent each month because they feel unsafe within their school buildings. The CDC reports that roughly 4,400 deaths each year are a result of suicide among young people. 


Were you aware that in March of 2012 The Hunger Games, a fictional movie that tells the story of children put in an arena to kill each other off received a PG-13 rating while the movie Bully; a non fictional documentary about the day to day lives of 5 families who's children suffer school bullying was pegged with an R rating. I'm not bashing The Hunger Games, I'm actually a huge fan of the saga and how it portrays the effects of war on a civilization. But I think that allowing the murder of children to be watered down is wrong. Just so Hollywood could stamp a PG-13 rating to sell more movie tickets to younger children; while a factual documentary exposing the world of kids who struggle to make it through school nearly day to day was given an R. 


Last week a story surfaced about a 68 year old middle bus monitor who was verbally tormented by the children on the bus to the point of tears. There's a 10 minute video available here on Youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E12R9fMMtos&feature=player_embedded#! I've made several attempts to watch this video and I can't get through the first minute before I have to stop. I can't even see the screen it makes me cry so hard.

My stomach twists in agony, these kids think this behavior is acceptable. Why? Why do they feel it's ok to say vile disgusting things to someone? Is this normal for them? Do they hear things like this at home? What has such a poisonous influence on our children that it's become so popular to spit hate?


My mind keeps bringing me back to the kids in our karate school. Do they hear these things at their school? Are they victims themselves? The children in the above video made a 68 year old cry. Imagine how a 9 year old would feel. Words are just as powerful as actions, and they cut just as deeply. 


In our school respect is a huge deal, and it's not just respect for those who are older and a higher rank than you, but respect for your peers, respect for yourself. I feel like we as martial artists have an obligation to teach the younger generations that they can rise above this. That they don't have to be a bully, or be the children bullied. I want our kids to have the self confidence to remove themselves from these situations, to help change them. The kids in the video need structure, they need a clear definition of acceptable and abhorrent behavior. I am a firm believe that karate helps to shape people and the younger you're able to start the better it is; but it all depends on the teacher. 


I want to encourage our students to learn karate, and at the same time to be motivating, caring, supportive individuals that accept others and are willing to stand up for those who may need their help if that time ever comes. I never want to hear of a situation involving one of our students like the one above where they are an antagonist. I want to encourage our kids to take a stand, to bring the situation to a teacher, a parent, a coach. And I want to encourage you to do the same. Let's stand together against this epidemic; let's teach our students how to take a stand. 

Living In The Moment

I'm a huge Jason Mraz fan, not to the extent of obsessed but his music gives me happy feelings in my heart that's for sure. I'm sure you're already thinking, "What the heck does this have to do with Kenpo??" :) I'm getting there.

We opened the Academy nine months ago and it has been the greatest thing we've ever done. When at first you have something new in your life you can't help but be excited about it all the time. Then after awhile it just becomes routine, and you start to look towards the future. And with a business, the future can be scary. You start to think about the "what ifs"; What if we don't get any more new students, what if the students we have get bored and leave; what if we expect too much rank wise from our students and they leave because they feel like they're not getting anywhere? And they just keep snowballing and they get bigger and scarier.

This morning I was listening to Jason Mraz's new album LOVE (I highly recommend it by the way); and his song Living In The Moment came on. I was singing along with Jason when it hit me how applicable this song was to my life. I need to stop stressing about the future, it's not even here yet; and I need to let the past pass me by. I need to live right here in the moment, rather than be so focused on the future that I miss what's right in front of me. There's so much wonderful right here and now, we have so many students that are working their butts off and they love it. That is honestly the absolute best part, is every single student that steps onto that mat three times a week to let us share this Art with them. I love how excited they get when they learn something new. It melts my heart to see their faces when they receive a new stripe, or a new belt. Rank is not given, it is earned; and I'll be the first to tell you that karate is HARD. It honestly can be months in between stripes, it depends on the student. How much they practice, how much they remember, but when they earn their next rank you can bet they earned. :)

So, thanks to Jason Mraz I am now even more excited for the next karate class. I am so thankful for the students and parents that are now a part of my life. We've created a little Kenpo family, and it makes me so happy. Remember to live in the moment, appreciate what you have and set the example for others; you never know who's looking up to you.